Awakening

There is a place I dare not look
Where a darkness dwells...
A darkness you won't find in any book.
In that place, that place I dare not look;
There lies, torment and anguish
Fear... earthquakes that shook, shook!
There... in Dante's Hell
There... in the deepest well
There... the screams are muted that I Yell!
That place, that is where I must go
To take back, to accept, to become whole
To cry, to mend, forgive and let go...
I've come far in my life
Overcame many obstacles, hurdles and bounds
I've known sorrow, regret, shame and strife.
I've had courage when I felt despair
I've had hope when life seemed bleak
I've had love when I felt there was no one to care.
That place... in that dank, caustic darkness
There... I must look with eyes wide open
Sit, be... within my own inwardness.
Sit with the child that I once was
Those many moons ago...
within the cryptic jaws, it gnaws.
It slashes! Rips! Is all consuming in that place.
Or so it would make me believe...
Holding me in its flagitious embrace.
Eyes wide open I must look and see;
The demons I tucked away so long ago
The memories, a vast sea.
I must take back that which I have given
That which the child endured, survived...
The darkness within shall no longer have a haven.
I will see, I will feel, I will cry one last time
and then... a leaf in the wind; I will let go
Another step forward... on this path of mine.