The Niggle

What is the niggle?
What is it that set ablaze to all I know?
Is it fear? An imperfection? a tingling doubt?
Is it the past catching up with the present?

My heart is in ashes, as I watch the flames
flicker and heat... on my dying heartbeat.
All set a sunder, I am helpless to distinguish
turn back time is my only wish.

I have to believe beneath the icy front
My love is dying inside as the flames
dance upon her once warm heart,
And the pain is eating her as it is me.

I have to believe the love we feel
was both felt and shared by our charred hearts.
That she misses me as a flower
Misses the Sun, and I miss her

What is that niggle that has undone?
Has burrowed and split what was true
And turned my sunny world to every shade of blue.
Oh, what has that niggle done?

Two hearts that began to beat as one
The deceptive niggle would have some fun.
"Push me away will you!" The niggle would say
"I'll burn it all! And ruin your sunny day!"

I have to believe the tears I shed
She cries them too, from eyes and heart in blood red.
That her insides feel as torn as mine
that she misses her hand in mine.

I have to believe she misses
the warmth of me and all my kisses.
Oh, that damn niggle!! Has won this day
Left two hearts shambled in dismay.

Two hearts that love each other
and keep guard over the magic that is.
Two souls, beautiful, kind and free
she was always meant for me...

What is the niggle? For this I do not know
But I will search hi and I will search low
To find the niggle that has crushed and torn
an amazing love that was deservingly born.

My love, I know in my soul
You are the half to make me whole.
I'll not let that niggle, whatever he may be
Be the last thoughts of you and me.

Come back my love

Come back love,
Come back from the darkness...
Let my love be a guiding light.
Let my love be your warmth
In the bitterness of cold;
Let my love be your strength
when the unknown takes your courage.
Let my love be your comfort
when the demons begin to scrape and gnaw.
Come back from the darkness;
Remember my smile, my touch,
The laughes, the joys, our loving embrace.
Come back to the light;
Feel my warmth, my strength, my love.
You are mine and I am yours,
Come back my love
Remember my hands, my kisses,
Remember my kind stare and loving caresses.
Remember that I also need you;
I need your light, for my world is dark
I need your strength...
To take the steps I cannot make alone.
I need your warmth...
The cold of life has chilled me to the bone.
I need your love, and loving embrace;
I'm only half... you are missing.
Come back my love,
Come back from the darkness...
Come back and make me whole,
Come back with the heart you stole.
Remember my love, remember the wonderfulness
Remember us... remember our love.

Crimson dancer

Caffè lattes and mochas;
I see her, I see her amidst the swirling,
Dancing in the Jello, in the haze of twilight.
She is a beacon, lighting my darkness,
I can see those corners that were hidden
I can see the teeth, the claws, the demons...
She twirls and moves, hypnotizing... euphoric
Naked, but a red scarf swinging in the air.
Moving, lighting, bearing what I cannot,
The darkness, the monsters, the ashes of my mind.
Thoughts race of forgetting, all those years ago
The demons... oh so clever, dripping their stench;
she dances, her breasts firm, point to that...
That which has secretly haunted me.
Jello splashing below the soft flesh of feet
It's crimson color spreading...
In the crimson darkness, she dances.
Like moths to a flame, I'm beaconed...
I'm there, naked, vulnerable, cold.
She dances, the darkness, the mist, the demons
All swirling around me like tornadoes
No longer can I hide, no longer can I run!
But my body moves... she dances...
In the darkness the teeth, claws, rage
they move! The light has awakened!
my legs begin to bob, like a floater on a fishing line
Up then down, Up then down as I stare;
Forgotten horrors begin to emerge in the mist,
Taloned arms and blood soaked legs.
She dances... bare breasts never swaying;
Questions begin to flood, Who? Why? What?
"Who is the woman dancing?" The light...?
My body begins to imitate, moving...
Talons scraping, teeth gnawing, Jello splashing!
She dances... cold, my body follows, dancing...
The darkness, the memories, the child,
Play out in the light shining in the mist.
Anger, sorrow, pain lash at my nakedness
In the crimson dark with the crimson dancer.
The woman... a beacon of light;
In the light, she comforts and warms,
In the light, she shows the darkness, the demons...
She is hope, she is sorrow, she is forgiveness.
She is the light that was ever absent;
So the demons played and scraped in the darkness.
Filling my mind with the stench of foul laughter
My body with the aches of a thousand slashes.
She dances... I dance, seeing, feeling, awakening
Look into the mist, look at the child...
Cold, lonely, frightened, crying.
Bodies glistening, crimson, naked...
The crimson dancer and I dance in the twilight.
The child, the demons, the child, the demons;
We dance, splashing, lighting, exposing...
The past, the dark, the demons;
Feeling, the lost feelings that once were buried
Anger! The child can bare no more.
Show me crimson dancer!
light what I cannot see, what I have locked away.
Fear of what was left behind, guarded...
The child endured, sacrificed, survived!
The visions, the memories, swirling; demons reaching!
Lost in thought, in time the mist is engulfing!
It is time, the strength, the compassion,
The love, the anger, the forgiveness...
I look up from the mist, no longer dancing...
I see a child, the crimson dancer, twirling in the light.
The guilt, the burden, the shame, the anger...
Released into the mist, the darkness,
I sit where a lonely child once was,
Watching, smiling as the two dance in the light.